(Source: 9eyes, via whatafuckinfamilypicture)

thegestianpoet:

i just went for a run in my neighborhood

as i have done most nights for the past week or two

and tonight i ran past a woman walking her dog and i thought the dog was pooping 

AND FOR SOME INSANELY STUPID REASON I DECIDED TO TELL HER “IT’S OK” THAT HER DOG WAS POOPING AS I RAN BY

only I had just done hills and was really out of breath 

so I’M PRETTY SURE it came out as 

“IT’S OK IF YOU POOP”

LIKE THIS

I TOLD A WOMAN IT WAS OK FOR HER TO POOP AND THEN RAN AWAY FROM HER

HOW DO I REMAIN IN THIS UNIVERSE 

(via break-on-through)

(via hogw-rts)

(Source: lawyerupasshole, via brunettesluts-with-tanlines)

shesjustawhore:

 

“Hello Lifealert”

“Hello Stella, are you okay?”

“… is your refrigerator running?”

“Stella, we’re all getting a little tired of your bullshit”

(via tiffani-rose)

lebanesetana:

9 Photos of Barack Obama & food

(via whatafuckinfamilypicture)

hop1ng:

unff

(via hogw-rts)

(Source: abrokenfishbowl, via thepizzaqueen)

(via absolutelyalexmarie)

kawaiipyro:

the plot thickens

(via whatafuckinfamilypicture)